“Mom! I have to get to work soon, so you can stay here, but I won’t be back until late. I sell animals now and... Mom?” No answer. I step into the small living room and see no one. I worry that I’m going crazy and that I’ve just imagined that my mother was ever here, but I see a Post-it note on the front door saying she’s gone out for groceries, so I relax. Uniform on, I head to Alfonso’s to see if he’s recovered from my drunken outbursts and to claim my paycheck.
Outside, the air is perfectly still and the clouds are undisturbed. I hear the chatter of small birds and paranoid squirrels and think to myself, now this is why I love nature. Without realizing it, I trip over some uneven pavement and scrape my knee. And this is why I hate society. I dust myself off and as I get back up a blonde girl about my age whisks past me dressed as if she works at the clinic. “Put some hydrogen peroxide on it, you’ll be fine,” she shouts at me and continues running on. So she probably does work there. I freeze in mid-thought as my first vision in months intercepts my eyesight.
…
“Get this girl some air people! Move back! Move back!.” There’s a crowd of people huddled over a girl who looks like me, wait no, it is me. The blonde girl I’d just seen is shouting orders and people back away swiftly as she waves them away. On the ground, I am unconscious and she kneels beside me to check my pulse. She yells something that I can’t hear and then turns me on my side. “She’s breathing, just... really slowly. I need a pillow, blankets, water, and an emetic to induce vomiting. Let’s go! Let’s go!” A spanish woman runs off and returns with the necessary materials and I watch my body wretch back and forth. Vomit spews from my now purple lips and my skin pales in comparison to the white tile floor. “It seems she’s had too much to drink...” Alcohol poisoning?
…
When the vision is over, I’m a little hurt by my future foolish decision and wonder when this will all happen. I frown when I think of the bad habits I’ve acquired over time and hypothesize that this will all happen very soon. I shuffle my feet into Alfonso’s and smile at the old guy. “‘Fonso, pay up.” I smile mischievously and hold out my hand.
“Yonnie, my little cannoli! Are you feeling better? I have your paycheck right here. Come, come let’s talk.” I sit down at the small chess table in the employee’s only room and wait for him to hobble over to the chair opposite me. Looking down at the chess board, I make my first move. My first pawn moves forward two places and Alfonso smiles knowingly.
“You want to go again? Okay, I show you how it’s done.” He sits down slowly and moves a pawn as well. “You know I look out for you. You are like family to me don’t you? Back home, I’d call you my Dolcezza.”
“I know, ‘Fonso. We look out for each other.” I move another pawn then tuck my legs underneath the table.
“But you must be careful, Amore. I am not so young and you are wasting away. I can tell you have not been happy. Your face is like wilting flowers. But it is almost spring! You need sun! You need love!” Another pawn moves.
“ ‘Fonso, don’t try to match me up with another one of your nephews.”
“That’s not what this is.”
“Then what is it? You have feelings for me, vecchio (old man)?” I smirk knowingly and he chuckles at my joke with the little bit of Italian he taught me.
“Oh, Amore, you are much too good for me.” The creases beside his eyes appear when he smiles to himself, but they quickly unfold again when he returns to a serious disposition. We’ve both moved on to moving our bishops and he quickly captures a few of my pawns. “Yonnie, I worry for you.”
“Well, chess isn’t my best game...”
“You know what I mean. You must let go of your past. I want to see you fly..”
“Is this... an intervention?” He takes another one of my pawns and I swallow hard.
“Chi non va non vede, chi non vede non sa e chi non sa se lo prende sempre in culo... It means if you dont go, you wont see; if you don’t see, you won’t know; if you don’t know, you’ll take it in the ass every time. Pay attention to what the world is trying to show you, Yonnie. Check...” I look at the chessboard and my king is almost surrounded. In an attempt to save him, I move him one space to the right. Alfonso frowns and murmurs something. Then he fiddles with his queen before placing her directly in front of my king. “Checkmate...”
There’s an awkward silence for a while and then I decide to leave, having been defeated twice in one sitting. He hands me my check with a faint tremor in his hands and allows me to have the day off, reluctantly, and after a short debate he resolves to let me walk home alone. “It’s two buildings down ‘Fonso, I’ll be fine.” He pats my head and moves out of my way. His eyes look sad and wise, but I ignore the piercing gaze and return to my apartment in a sullen mood.
When I open the door to my apartment, my mom is on the sofa. She turns around enthusiastically and says, “I got Tequila!” She hands me a shot glass and we begin to drink to our failures. How's that for flying, 'Fonso? Soon I feel the familiar sensation of a spinning room.
Outside, the air is perfectly still and the clouds are undisturbed. I hear the chatter of small birds and paranoid squirrels and think to myself, now this is why I love nature. Without realizing it, I trip over some uneven pavement and scrape my knee. And this is why I hate society. I dust myself off and as I get back up a blonde girl about my age whisks past me dressed as if she works at the clinic. “Put some hydrogen peroxide on it, you’ll be fine,” she shouts at me and continues running on. So she probably does work there. I freeze in mid-thought as my first vision in months intercepts my eyesight.
…
“Get this girl some air people! Move back! Move back!.” There’s a crowd of people huddled over a girl who looks like me, wait no, it is me. The blonde girl I’d just seen is shouting orders and people back away swiftly as she waves them away. On the ground, I am unconscious and she kneels beside me to check my pulse. She yells something that I can’t hear and then turns me on my side. “She’s breathing, just... really slowly. I need a pillow, blankets, water, and an emetic to induce vomiting. Let’s go! Let’s go!” A spanish woman runs off and returns with the necessary materials and I watch my body wretch back and forth. Vomit spews from my now purple lips and my skin pales in comparison to the white tile floor. “It seems she’s had too much to drink...” Alcohol poisoning?
…
When the vision is over, I’m a little hurt by my future foolish decision and wonder when this will all happen. I frown when I think of the bad habits I’ve acquired over time and hypothesize that this will all happen very soon. I shuffle my feet into Alfonso’s and smile at the old guy. “‘Fonso, pay up.” I smile mischievously and hold out my hand.
“Yonnie, my little cannoli! Are you feeling better? I have your paycheck right here. Come, come let’s talk.” I sit down at the small chess table in the employee’s only room and wait for him to hobble over to the chair opposite me. Looking down at the chess board, I make my first move. My first pawn moves forward two places and Alfonso smiles knowingly.
“You want to go again? Okay, I show you how it’s done.” He sits down slowly and moves a pawn as well. “You know I look out for you. You are like family to me don’t you? Back home, I’d call you my Dolcezza.”
“I know, ‘Fonso. We look out for each other.” I move another pawn then tuck my legs underneath the table.
“But you must be careful, Amore. I am not so young and you are wasting away. I can tell you have not been happy. Your face is like wilting flowers. But it is almost spring! You need sun! You need love!” Another pawn moves.
“ ‘Fonso, don’t try to match me up with another one of your nephews.”
“That’s not what this is.”
“Then what is it? You have feelings for me, vecchio (old man)?” I smirk knowingly and he chuckles at my joke with the little bit of Italian he taught me.
“Oh, Amore, you are much too good for me.” The creases beside his eyes appear when he smiles to himself, but they quickly unfold again when he returns to a serious disposition. We’ve both moved on to moving our bishops and he quickly captures a few of my pawns. “Yonnie, I worry for you.”
“Well, chess isn’t my best game...”
“You know what I mean. You must let go of your past. I want to see you fly..”
“Is this... an intervention?” He takes another one of my pawns and I swallow hard.
“Chi non va non vede, chi non vede non sa e chi non sa se lo prende sempre in culo... It means if you dont go, you wont see; if you don’t see, you won’t know; if you don’t know, you’ll take it in the ass every time. Pay attention to what the world is trying to show you, Yonnie. Check...” I look at the chessboard and my king is almost surrounded. In an attempt to save him, I move him one space to the right. Alfonso frowns and murmurs something. Then he fiddles with his queen before placing her directly in front of my king. “Checkmate...”
There’s an awkward silence for a while and then I decide to leave, having been defeated twice in one sitting. He hands me my check with a faint tremor in his hands and allows me to have the day off, reluctantly, and after a short debate he resolves to let me walk home alone. “It’s two buildings down ‘Fonso, I’ll be fine.” He pats my head and moves out of my way. His eyes look sad and wise, but I ignore the piercing gaze and return to my apartment in a sullen mood.
When I open the door to my apartment, my mom is on the sofa. She turns around enthusiastically and says, “I got Tequila!” She hands me a shot glass and we begin to drink to our failures. How's that for flying, 'Fonso? Soon I feel the familiar sensation of a spinning room.
